i took a little break this weekend. Have you ever realized you were dreaming,
and then stayed in the dream? Not woken up, but also not taken up lucid dream
opportunities. Instead just hung around, spending time with the people in the
dream? Itβs bittersweet to enjoy somebodyβs company who will not exist soon.
itβs rude, isnβt it? to say things thoughtlessly. to say things without
thinking, without checking if they are true. that itβs rude to just say the
first thing that comes into your head without considering it, and the person or
people who will hear it. i think this might even be uncontroversial. i think
itβs easy to extrapolate from that that it is rude to send somebody many
paragraphs of text you have not read, especially if you are unwilling to take
authorial responsibility for it. it seems careless, and disrespectful. before,
if somebody i respect sent me a novel 8 paragraphs of text theyβd produced i
would know that it was inherently valuable to read. even if it turned out not to
be helpful in and of itself, the very fact that this person had put that much
effort into it, it is worth reading. look at all those words! but now you
fuckers can produce words in a faster time than it takes to even skim read them.
and there is a halting problem, i have to read the engage with this drivel to
know whether or not it was worth engaging with. please let us have dignity,
humanity and life.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gell-Mann_amnesia_effect
i feel like penguin off television sometimes, true.
getting off the train with my full backpack and overnight bag, the queue for the
shuttle seemed too unpleasant. i do not like to queue. a two and a half hour
walk doesnβt seem so bad. winchester is hills on hilltops. they must have
incredible legs, the locals. the map takes me to a path that didnβt exist,
through a farm field being worked on, it recommends that i walk in the pathway
of a plow. iβm standing on a T shaped crossroad, but the map says it is a +
shaped crossroad. no signal now, canβt load any more map. i pick a direction and
start going. thereβs a lady parked off the side of the lane. i ask if she is ok
she says iβm just waiting for my son. i ask if itβs for a drug deal or weapons
deal because why are we parked off the side of a country lane and she says ha ha
i just canβt meet him where i normally meet him because of π that music
festival. thatβs a boon, i follow her frustrated finger for another mile or so
until i see a sign. the only way forward now is to walk down the side of the
motorway, cars rushing by. i reached my limit an hour and a half ago but iβm
still going. itβs good for the mind to do an endurance test every now and again,
to be reminded that your limit is long after your limit. i find a way in to the
festival. the fellow patiently explains this is red gate a staff gate and i must
walk around the perimeter past east gate to south gate. off i trot. east gate.
south gate. bag straps carved into my shoulders. a queue. an hour. finally. no,
another queue, another thirty minutes. call from becky, iβm here. meet downtown.
through the camp site, down the steep dirt path, down the hilltop staircase,
down the metal stairs. meet becky. get tent. back to the campsite, up the metal
stairs, up the hilltop staircase, up the dirt path. becky demonstrates the
setting up and breaking down of the tent and refers me to some pictures of her
father should i get confused. dark now. finally, i settle down on a corner far
away. 7 hours have passed. i spend two days recovering enough from getting here
and setting up the tent that i can take down the tent and leave. but it was so
nice to see becky in her element.
on friday night i have a call with lucky. itβs four hours, iβm so cold
shivering, last night i woke myself up with the sound of my chattering teeth.
and then on saturday i go home. the moment iβm on the train, that oppressive
feeling of isolation lifts and i am rabbit once again. and we met in the red
light under the bridge by the emerald, and we lay down on a blanket in a
embankment park, and we had pizza at a place near charing x that does very
special yum yum pizza, it was a lovely night. and now lucky is in margate with
some friends and i am lying on the mattress and i feel as though iβve been
infected with some kind of illness. iβm very dry and everything hurts.
seems people think LLMs are good at the stuff they donβt respect as requiring
actual intelligence. backend people think itβs great at frontend code. frontend
people think itβs good at design. and of course leaders in the software space
who think in terms like βhow long would it take 2 senior developers to complete
this project?β without specifying which senior developers weβre talking about
believe it can replace a developer. do not listen to them, do not let them worry
you about your job, do not let them use this fear to intimidate you into
accepting lower pay. here is the prime objective: donβt go insane.
havenβt had a chance to think much about anything else yet.
but iβll off to luckyβs, and iβll read the journal entry from the first week,
and iβll kiss her in the shower in all my clothes and iβll get soaked and feel
distance and not know why and not ask.