Hello :)

On Thursday evening I went outside for perhaps the first time in March. As the oxygen started to re-enter my bloodstream I recalled I was in a very similar state of mind before flying to Mexico last year. Perhaps this is just what March is like for me.

On Friday I went into the office eventually. It was nice. Afterwards I attended the birthday bash of my at-work idol. It was a lot of fun. I saw some people I haven't seen in quite a while, and met some new people who were very lovely and funny. It was a splendid occasion and I'm quite touched that I was even invited and I will cherish the pencil.

My upstairs neighbour appears to have purchased at least part of a trumpet. Their practice lacks ambition. They seem to be struggling with embouchure, but I can hear them distracted by the valves– clattering on them needlessly. I'd recommend practicing with the mouthpiece alone and forget about the fingering for a while, so futile without the lip. You're doing fine, I believe in you, keep at it.

I'll get off the computer again now to do some cleaning and prepare something tasty for dinner.

If you have a free moment, and/or enjoy sending things in the mail, look at this cute project and send it a postcard: https://utopia.sadgirl.net/

An international postcard is £1.85. I usually just stick two first class stamps on when I'm sending a postcard to the United States, and then drop it in a normal postbox. That's 2x£1.10 stamps. I hope the postal service puts the extra 35p to good use.

Anyway, it's cute and you love sending letters so you should do it!

~ chee

I'm going to take my horse to the old town road and ride until I can't.

I think I'll have to stop eating vegetarian as it has presented as me just not eating anything at all. It all went well except that one evening last week when I literally forgot tuna is not a vegetable. I do enjoy a dietary restriction, though. It's a fine hobby. Perhaps i'll start eating kosher.

Spent most of the week drinking way too much coffee because of the new espresso machine and grinder. I keep wiring myself up to the highest degree and then freaking out. Feeling super anxious and wondering why as I top up my v60 with espresso. I should probably start drinking alcohol again, to bring this coffee consumption back under control. Also I must think of my readers. The engagement's just not the same as back when I took meth. Those were the days, JetPack stats off the chart.

Another blessed week of doing very little. I'm writing a parser for KDL right now. Getting into Common Lisp like this has made me understand why people might enjoy missionary work. When you are possession of such light, such joy it feels wrong not to share it. Especially when all somebody would have to do to reach this same heightened state is to let it into their life, accept it, let it save them. I've got a print copy of the specification sitting on my kitchen table. I read it in the mornings over coffee.

Is Funky Cold Medina based on a true story?

Anyway, have a good week.

My updates this year seem to be "worked; wrote common lisp; canceled plans to leave house". This week is the same. It was my birthday. As you know. I was planning on eating cheese in the bath like on new years, but instead I spent the day shopping for a new espresso machine and then getting the espresso machine and then looking at the espresso machine. I was meant to go out on Tuesday night but I have some really bad gender-dysphoria-going-on-agoraphobia type thing at the moment that has kept me safe and quiet in my home. My home has no bubble bath in it. It has coffee. The problem with the new espresso machine is it's very good, and now I need a new grinder. It's funny how these kinds thing work. Tier one, you pay a little but you have to do everything yourself. Tier two, you pay a bunch more money but everything is done for you. Tier three, you pay an extremely foolish amount of money and you get to do everything yourself. There is a pair of zuchinis on my kitchen table and I don't know what to do about it. At work I published a post on the internal blogging platform. I mentioned it had been my birthday and explained that everybody who didn't wish me a happy birthday is now on a list. Afterwards people DM'd me on various communication systems wishing me a happy birthday. Do they think that gets them taken off the list? The list is immutable. There is no way off the list. I have a headache. I'm probably dehydrated. I've probably never wished any of them a happy birthday. Not sure if the headache is getting worse or if it's more noticeable now that I'm trying to write. Maybe it's a lack of oxygen. That's not just for coffee, that tier system. Other things too. Many hobbies and crafts are like that, aren't they? I'd crack open a window but it sure is cold in here. There isn't really a list for people who didn't wish me a happy birthday. Maybe I could go for a walk. OK, I'll turn the heating on and crack open a window. I ate two eggs today. Two eggs ought to be enough for anyone. I guess it's 6pm and two eggs isn't enough for anyone. OK. I guess I'll spiralize them, the courgettes, eat them with cheese.

The week

By the end of the week I'd got sick and had to take a couple days off. Moments about a point.

It's my birthday next week. I'll be taking some time off to eat cheese in the bath. This is how I celebrate all events in 2023. New Year's - cheddar in the bath. Birthday - cheddar in the bath. Vernal equinox - ossau iraty in the shower. Easter - soak inside hot burrata for 3 days and emerge reborn. May day - brebis.

There was an event on Friday evening that I was meant to be attending with dearest Duckie and Pixie, but it was cancelled at the last minute. Luckily I had a backup plan which was just as enjoyable: doing literally nothing at all. 😌

On Saturday I tidied my entire apartment. Floors have been steamed. Walls have been scrubbed. There is so much space. It's fun to tidy the apartment and then rotate the sofa. It's like moving home. While I was tidying I kept breaking my own heart, telling myself things I know not to true. I mean, it is true that I have said no to a wonderful life. The only problem is it would not have been my life.

I'll pop off to the market now to see if they have any paneer. If not, i'll try my luck with lemon juice and a bucket of milk.

Questions

• What is the most springtime of the cheeses?

Tips

• With a clean rabbit and a tidy home you can do anything.
• If you think of something that makes you laugh, try adding it as a reminder so one day you wake up to a notification like:

DUE TODAY
yahoo stands for yet another hoo

• Listening to highly melodic music you know well through distortion and delay and ring modulators feels very good. Much like rubbing your hands against the bark of a strong tree.
• Writing the song "Nature Boy" is a greater thing in life than learning to love and be loved in return.