lmao.

Monday was a light day. Somebody came to my house to kiss me and then threw a pound coin onto my bed and left.

Tuesday was the work Christmas party. It was a lovely night. My favourite moment of the night was when ▮▮▮▮▮▮▮▮▮▮ ▮▮▮▮▮▮ to me during ▮▮▮▮▮▮▮▮▮▮ and we ▮▮▮▮▮▮▮ and ▮▮▮▮ “▮ ▮▮▮▮▮ ▮▮▮▮▮ ▮▮▮▮ ▮▮▮▮▮▮▮▮ ▮▮▮ ▮▮▮▮▮ ▮▮” and then we ▮▮▮▮▮▮▮▮▮ until the end of the night. It was special. Wet eyes, big smiles.

On Wednesday I was super chill and normal as usual.

On Thursday I learned that I’m a little bitch who can’t be trusted. It was tough. I can’t actually write about any of the details of this here, my week is full of important events that I can’t write about. It’s the first time I think I’ve felt I can’t express myself here safely or well. It’s the beginning of the end. I guess I’ll have to find something else to do.

Let’s talk about alchemy. It’s the process of turning your dirty leaden soul into beautiful, rich, highly conductive gold. Did you know that “magnum opus” means “great work”? It means the same thing as masterpiece. In order to create your great work, you have to become the person who can create it. The traditional is becoming knowledgeable enough, and clean enough of spirit, to learn to turn iron or lead into gold. But whatever your art is, the great work is to turn yourself into the person who is able to create it via the very process of creating it. It’s a single motion; as above so below; as the world so the soul.

I spent Friday in bed. I had one bad phonecall, one good phonecall, some other good things happened. Someone fed me. I headed home.

On Saturday I made a tasty meal with tomatoes and beyond beef mince and fresh fennel and many spices, it was very tasty. I spent the day in bed. Mostly making music. Some hanging out. I made an 8 track quiet party release called “ATTENTION DEADZONE HYPERACTIVITY“.

it’s mostly mixed, but needs mastered. it’s only, like, 9 minutes long. this is what i do now, these little short releases of a few short songs.

Week 50: meeting with the goddess, woman as the temptress, atonement with the father, get the gift, pay the price.

Week 51 better start looking like joy, success and vitality pretty fucking soon.